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When the producers said that Carole Bayer Sager was “subdued,” they weren’t kidding. Please! Stop the guest judge madness!

Here are my other thoughts…

I missed them not doing an into last night. It’s just not the same if you don’t hear Ryan say, “This is ‘American Idol’”…

Why did Paula get shoved to the end? That’s just wrong…

So what reality show will Ian (“Gloria”) try out for next to get on TV? “America’s Got Talent”?...

Had Carol never watched the show? It was clear she didn’t know what she was getting into…

I was worried that Sarah (“Call Me”) wouldn’t be able to sing after secretly flying to New York from Ohio. I wonder how her dad really feels. Getting ambushed by Ryan didn’t give him much time to think. Of course, I’m rooting for her because she’s from Ohio…

Is it just me or does Carol look like Joan Collins?...

Carol wasn’t kidding about Ashanti (“Loving You”) being good for Broadway. I think she just did her monologue. Maybe if she’d rehearsed her singing a little more than her acting. I wonder why they didn’t show us what she looked like before?...

So why did Amanda and Antonella sound so bad together? And I agree with the judges that Antonella was better, but I can’t believe she told Amanda that. Maybe she took Simon’s advice after all. They’ll be a story in Hollywood…

Okay, the thing with William (“Dreamin’”) was pretty mean…

How cute was Jenry (“I’d Give Anything…”)? Yes, Paula, he is “easy on the eyes”…

Okay, new rule. Do not start the auditions without Simon. It’s just not as fun…

I wonder what Simon would have said about Nakia (“Dancing in the Streets”)? If she could’ve stayed anywhere near the tune on that second one, she would’ve made it…

Why in the world is “Dreamin’” so popular this year?...

And suddenly Carol comes alive with Sarah! “I could be the only American Idol that doesn’t sing”? What was that girl smoking? She should be glad Simon wasn’t there…

So did Simon really have a hangover and that’s why he wasn’t there?...

How old was that “New Yor, New Yor” guy?...

The “American Idol” soldier? Well, Simon enjoyed it, until she wanted to hug him. I would’ve thought that he would’ve liked that…

I know that name thing was edited together, but the sudden appearance of Olivia Newton-John was a little weird…

I was wondering when the Simon-Paula lovefest would end. I would’ve liked to have heard Christopher sing another song…

Why did Randy have Rachel sing another song? I liked the Jeff Buckley song. But I have a feeling we have another Mikalah on our hands…

What was that scary Dorothy person?...

Simon thinks Christopher (“A Song For You”) could surprise. I think he sees something…

Nicholas’ story is a perfect example of why I love the Hollywood rounds. I wish they would give them more time. You can see that Paula’s glad he’s back. He will be a HUGE story in Hollywood…

I think they left Isadora until last on purpose. Carole’s reaction was priceless. I think that performance ranks right up there with the “Like A Virgin” guy…

Speaking of which. Tuesday looks very interesting…